Letter to a Senator

So, I recently learned that my senator, Harry Reid, was one of the ones that voted to cut military pensions. Well, this is the letter I sent to him, I doubt that I'll get a response, but here it is for all to see.

Senator H. Reid,

As a Veteran of the USAF, though I may be young, and was not old enough to have earned the pensions that so many of my other fellow veterans were able to acquire, I can honestly feel the sting of betrayal. While I myself did not lose any benefits this time around, due to changed to the budget, I lost all benefits that go with being a veteran, up to and including my GI bill. It is very likely Sir, that since my benefits were lost that I will not finish college any time soon.

There are others that are reaching the point in their life where they are old enough to serve, and now, may no longer consider a life in the military due to budgetary cuts to military benefits. I would ask you Sir, if you would be so kind, to perhaps personally address the concerns of not only veterans, but spouses, and dependents of military members to state in your own words why a vote to cut our benefits was necessary.

I certainly do not expect a response Senator, nor do I believe that I will get one. I learned in my brief time in the military that rarely will one stand up when they are questioned, and rarer still will one stand up to promises made, and convictions said to be held. I do not expect you to make right the wrongs that you and others have committed, I only wish to state that you have turned your back on the flag, you have turned your back on the blood of the brave millions that have served, fought, and died for the flag and nation that you claim to stand for.

All of that said Senator, I do wish you a Merry Christmas and a happy new year.

Matthew Gerald Versluis, USAF 2008-2011

P.S.

I can only hope that you will at some point do right by all of us that have truly bled for the flag and will take our side.

A long time and faults.

             It has been a very long time since my last entry, and as only a few of your know, I now live in Las Vegas, and have since October of 2011 after getting out of the Air Force. As far as why I'm out? Well, that is simply down to personal faults, namely, pride. While I have indeed read the story of Icarus and knew the dangers of hubris. Pride was the downfall of Icarus and so was my downfall. Those of you that know me closest know the story, and very few will ever be privy to it here. But more importantly is my Birthday. Now, the reason why I bring this up, is very simply the fact that I feel that I have already achieved the most important act that I can be a part of.

             Im twenty five, and the high point of my life was when I was twenty two years old, in March of 2011. I played a small part in the earthquake relief in Japan, and today I find myself in the shadow of my younger and dumber self. If I had not been as full of hubris as I was, I'd not have that event in my life, and because of that, my own ghost haunts me.

             This is magnified by other things, several of which affect me every day. I have a strong desire for validation and recognition to the point where it affects my 'friends' and family to the point where I seem to ignore what I get from family, certainly something that bothers me, but at the very least then I realize this. I am not quite sure where this neediness comes from, but it is there. Seemingly tied in with this is what I tend to put on for show as a fairly gregarious personality, all an act. Unfortunately, I do tend to get caught up in my personality and can become offensively clingy, see validation. I can be honestly happy with my friends, my real ones, you know who you are, but with the others, at work, out and about, its an act. The very fact that my personality is a construct, can deeply bother me at times. And finally at the end of it, a very strong sense of paranoia. Due to having been trod on so many times by other people and through failed endeavors, I firmly believe in never trusting anything until it happens. The last thing that I tend to tryst in life is someone that promises and then doesn't deliver. I understand that life happens every now and again, but very few people make it up after the failure happens. I do realize that for the most part I am far too bitter, and far concluded in my beliefs too be as young as I am.

             Now, on the bright side, at least I am able to realize my faults, and simply put I can work on those. There is one good thing about this, the very fact that I am unable to work on these at the moment does not mean that I am without hope, as few people realize a good portion of their faults, of course that could be a sort of hubris too, I am not quite sure. My sister recently posted a song to her facebook page “Let it go”, and I've been listening to it over and over. And sure, I'm not a Disney princess, I can't go from fearing my past to rejoicing in the freedom of shuffling off responsibility in a small musical number, but, well, maybe I should try it? Really, what's the worst that could happen? Maybe if I can finally let go of my paranoia, that all of it will eventually just fall away like so many snowflakes in a gust. Anyway, here you go, I wish that I could say that i'm not looking for validation, but I am, and the most likely thing that'll happen,is that I'll just ignore it, so there's that.